The scientific world rejoiced on Friday after news broke that North Korea had discovered a cure for AIDS… and Ebola.

The Korea Central News Agency revealed the discovery late on Thursday evening, with scientists trumpeting the Kumdang-2 drug as a cure for the both the deadly virus and the fatal infection.

kim jong un

Thousands of North Koreans gather at the Kim Il Sung Square, Tuesday, Jan. 6, 2015 in Pyongyang, North Korea

According to the state-run news service, the drug is made from ginseng, which is grown from fertilizer and mixed with “micro-quantities of gold and platinum.”

The Kumdang-2 website notes that it also cures “malicious virus infections,” including SARS and MERS thanks to drug’s qualities as a “strong immune reviver.”

According to regime-friendly websites, the drug was first developed in 1996, and was used during the 2006 outbreak of bird flu.

So well done Kim Jong-un and the scientists of North Korea. What a wonderful gift to humanity.

Unless they’re lying…

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